The new season of Big Brother is just over 13 hours away. Preparations have made. Food has been purchased, children have been otherwise entertained, Big Brother After Dark (Showtime) and feeds have been ordered. Soon I will find myself whiling away hours upon hours, watching other people who are whiling away hours upon hours. I will watch strangers make and prepare food, consume it (rather loudly in some cases), brush their teeth, apply make up, lunge, do squats, blow their noses, have private conversations, reveal confidential information, cry, laugh, sweat, complain, whine, joke, water the garden, lounge by the pool, plot, scheme, fight, nap, and then do the whole thing again. It will make me feel like a Level 10 creeper, especially since I PAID to do it. I will not only watch these things unfold, but I will read about them, write about them, and analyze them. I will call my friends and family to get their opinions on them. My children will know the names of each house guest. It is an out and out obsession.
So my advice to anyone who is feeling guilty about the Big Brother adventure that they are about to embark upon: Embrace your inner creeper. Enjoy this summer, because another one won't come around until next year!
